Meet Jasper. He’s a bit mis-named, as he’s more like a tank than a delicate gem, but after 13 years we can’t change it now. Jasper likes to play alarm clock. Somewhere around 5:00 or 5:30 he starts gently tapping my side. Have I mentioned I’m ticklish? The little fiend knows that too, so of course I jerk every time he touches me which wakes me up. He then stares, as if the very force of his will alone will cause me to rise out of bed and cater to his needs.

I manage to ignore him for about an hour, at which point he becomes a bit surly and frustrated and will either use me as a human trampoline or howl at the top of his lungs while pacing the floor or, more likely, the bed. With me in it. He demands breakfast be served, and it must be fresh. He can’t be expected to eat the food in the bowl. That’s been there since last night!

Once he’s fed, it’s time for a post-meal nap. When he’s relaxed, he’ll put up with a lot of stuff—like hats perched on his belly. I tried to get the hat on his head but he didn’t think it fit well.

This is my furbaby, and he owns me. There is no question who wears the pants in our family. He does.

Yesterday I dragged my husband out by his hair took the husband outside for fresh air, and ended up wandering into a big warehouse superstore. You know, the kind you need a “membership” to enter, which is just a really cutesy way of getting you to pay for the mere privilege of giving them more money.

But I digress.

I wondered if there were any bargains to be had therein, so we snuck past the armed guard poor woman standing at the door, grabbed a cart like we knew what we were doing, and proceeded to explore the depths of this warehouse.

Have you ever been in one of these? The building is endless. The rows of products look like something a Greek God would be comfortable shopping at, except nothing is gilded in gold. Shelves stack all the way to the ceiling, and everything comes in mondo huge plus sizes. Have I mentioned we have no children? It’s just the hubby and me and one furbaby. That’s important to know, for future reference.

The first aisle filled my eyes with electronic stars. TVs and computers and cameras, oh my! I could really use all of those things. Actually that’s not true. I don’t need any of them, but they sat on those shelves and begged me to purchase. I turned my head and passed them by, quickly. We don’t need that, I said out loud.

The next aisle contained beverages. Actually, the next three aisles contained beverages. Every sort of non alcoholic liquid refreshment your throat could desire.

“Look! They have that water you like.” I pointed, and hubby dutifully grabbed a case of it and chucked it into the basket. He had to do that because the sides of the basket were up around my ears. Then…

“Look! They have the water I like too! and it’s cheaper!” He picked up a case of the indicated liquid and heaved it into the basket too.

A stack of paper plates taller than me went in next.

As did a giant bag of pretzel chips and a case of diet candy bars. (yes, diet! I’m sure they’re quite healthy too. Really. They have chocolate, and how could that be bad?)

By now we’re only halfway through the place and I’m giddy with all the money I’m spending saving. “Look how much cheaper the toilet paper is!” I exclaimed as I tossed 100 rolls of it into the cart.

We reached the candy aisle and my better judgment started to kick in. I grabbed hubby’s hand and pulled him clear of the caseloads of chocolate, gummies, and treats. I heard someone crying/throwing a temper fit/screaming…I’m pretty sure it wasn’t the hubby protesting. Really.

I’m not sure how long we were in hell the store, but by the time we’d perused every aisle we had a giant cart load of giant products and stood in a giant line to leave. At which point I remembered we weren’t supposed to be there in the first place.

Oops.

I did manage to go purchase a membership and get back to the line before hubby was escorted out by security. I’m also pleased to report that our purchases actually fit into the car. Barely.

The ride up the elevator was interesting.

Did I mention we live in an apartment?

“Where are we going to put all this stuff?” The hubby asked over a mountain of beverages now stowed on the counter.

“The bathroom?” *

At least when the next snowstorm or paper shortage hits, we’ll be well stocked and prepared with paper products and bottled water.

*Please note, I only stored the toilet paper in the bathroom. Really. The paper plates are on top of the washing machine.

Squeeee! This movie is Epic Awesomeness!!! Yes, it’s so good it needs three exclamation points!!!

Seriously, I went into this thinking there was no way it would live up to the greatness that was the first Star Trek reboot. After all, nothing compares to meeting the characters for the first time and reliving the little odd bits of quirky manners that they pulled from the original tv series. I must have watched that first one at least 20 times by now, if not more. Yes, I loved it that much.

How does Into Darkness compare? I’ll now need to do a double feature when I re-watch the movies. They had the bar set ridiculously high with the first one and this one leapt over it with ease. The special effects, as in IronMan 3, are not only amazing and visually stunning but they serve the story, rather than the story serving them. This is a western, set in space, with all the fun toys and gadgets and fantastic looking ships. If you haven’t seen the first one, what planet are you on? Go see it, and then see Into Darkness. Oh hell, just go see it now. Watch it in 3D, because I hear it’s fantastic. I saw it in 2D and it was enjoyable. I never missed the 3D but it’s hard to miss what you haven’t experienced.

Into Darkness is aptly named, as it takes Kirk through his darkest moments and helps him grow into the man he’s destined to be. The entire crew is shaking up and getting to know each other. It’s hard to be a well oiled machine without a little bit of wear and tear, and that’s what they get in this story.

I loved that even in the darkest moments there were touches of humor and one liners and phrases that made the original series so loved.

Bones: “I”m a doctor, not a torpedo technician!”

(Bones is known for saying I’m not a doctor, I’m a (fill in the blank). I loved that they included one here.)

Kirk: If Spock were here, and I were there, what would he do?

Bones: He’d let you die.

(That’s actually funny in context…you need to see it to appreciate it. The whole audience laughed).

Spock: Captain, this ship will not fit.

Kirk: It will fit! It will fit! It will fit! (Kirk steers the ship through a tight hole, barely)

Kirk: See, I told you it would fit!

Spock: I am not sure that qualifies.

I can’t wait for the next one!

The answer to last week’s puzzle:

A Taste of Ice is book #2 in The Elementals series by Hannah Martine. I’m a huge fan of book #1 (see my review here), and book 2 did not disappoint. The world continues to grow and develop as Martine introduces new characters and continues the story from before in one nice, well rounded heap of awesomeness.

A Taste of Ice starts out at a slow burn and focuses on the budding relationship between two misfits: Xavier (a chef and a Secondary, or not quite human alien from another planet but still amazingly hot with steamy grey eyes) and Cat (an artist with breathtaking skill who is drawn to water). Xavier has a lot of sexual issues he needs to work through, and Cat is more than willing to see him through the hard times (er, no pun…well okay, pun intended). Just when things are heating up between them, politics and outside pressures heat up as well, and the story swings into action. I didn’t mind the slow start, because it gave me plenty of time to get to really know Xavier and Cat so that when things go really wrong, I’m rooting for them the entire way.

First Line:

Xavier Jones lingered on the edge of chaos, and about a thousand people stood between him and his knives.

The first morning of the Turnkorner Film Festival and already he could throw a rock and hit a celebrity. For two weeks each winter, that’s exactly what he wanted to do. He hadn’t moved to White Clover Creek, Colorado, for the swarms of film lovers, the squealing fans, or the demanding Hollywood types. He’d come here for the other fifty weeks of the year, when the insular world of the historic mountain town wrapped its arms tightly around his life, and helped him forget what needed to be forgotten.

I love the first line. It had my brain heading in one direction, and then later on turns it completely around. Talk about get my attention! Why are so many people around and what, exactly, does he want with knives? I knew him from the first book so I didn’t figure he was a mass murderer but then again…you just never know these days do you?

Is he, indeed, a mass murderer looking for people to stab? Or is there someone even more sinister waiting to destroy them both?  I think you should read it and find out!

I loved this story because it continues a world I’d already come to know in the first book, and when it’s a rainy day outside nothing is more comforting than diving into a familiar place, and exploring the people within it. This sort of series keeps things fresh and new, while letting me keep my feet firmly grounded in an extraordinary new world. The wonderfully sexy times don’t hurt either. If you’re looking for some hot steamy times, mixed with some sexual disfunction, a psychopath, politics, great food, art, and elemental magic, look no further. The special powers might come from aliens, but it’s still magic to me!

By the way, as a side note to the author, I’d give anything to actually see the paintings that Elizabeth created. Hint, hint.